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mysskhryss
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Name: krissy
Location: Fayetteville, Arkansas, United States
Gender: Female
Interests: COLORADO, writing, music, friends, surfing, hiking, dancing, laughing, APO, baseball, SCUBA diving, rock climbing, running, mountain biking, football, traveling, driving, writing, reading, learning, photography, food, cooking, dogs, people, language
Expertise: all of the above
Occupation: Student
Industry: Education/Research
Message: message me
MSN: ravens_r_us@hotmail.com
Yahoo:  mysskhryss
Member Since:
12/31/2004
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| well, it's christmas. *yawns* i've been up since 530am. yet now i'm at work. blarg. *shrugs* such is life i guess.
at the risk of sounding to pretentious, i dont like christmas just because it's a giant commercial or because there's hardly any religion in it anymore. i just dont like christmas. i haven't since i was about five. so please quit "beating me up" on not liking christmas. i know the back ground fully, i've known it for quite some time. (remember i'm minoring in religous studies and my "pops" is a minister, i've worked in the church, etc etc).
dang i have a way of pissing people off, huh? one comment from me and pandora's box is open.
christmas morning was a bit of a blur. i didn't want to get of bed and trey pretty much refused so i was late to work because of it. blarg. *shrugs* oh well. i was only 5 minutes late. i got some cool things. though i feel bad because they got me a really awesome cd player/stereo thing that i'll sadly enough probably never use. :( it's really cool looking though. it's just that i play on my music on my computer. it's easier than having to deal with disks. *sighs* i'm not sure if i should ask them to take it back and if so i dont know how to ask. *sighs* i'm terrible i know.
i got a gift card to barnes and nobles (SWEET) and a book about colorado (it's a frommers like in eurotrip), an alarm clock (because the only ones i have are travel ones), a cool coffee cup/thermus type thing from barnes and noble, a lint roller (because Revy's hair gets all over my clothes and i've got allergies and most of my clothes are black), a book light (because i always read in my bed at night) and March of the Penguins (because i like penguins). mom sent me a tent, an MSR water purifier/filter, penguin salt and pepper shakers, and some miscellaneous stuff for camping/backpacking. "moms and pops" are getting me a cell phone. i dont know how thrilled i am about that. and tj from work and her spouse got me some old school cookie cutters. they're awesome. i'll have to make cookies now. i've never had cookie cutters before.
*sighs* mom just called me. i dont particularly like talking to my mom but i endured it. but she didn't seem to thrilled to talk to me. but i am sick and at work and that probably made me sound very unhappy and ungreatful. i'll call her later this evening. i called my sister but she was to busy for me. *sighs* i'm not sure i'll go visit her today. though i haven't seen her in a very long time. and i miss her a lot. i miss grandma so much. and i should probably stop thinking/typing about it because i miss my family so much. it's been forever since i've seem them. to cry at work isn't a good thing.
i need to call my dad. i feel so bad for him. he and my step mom are going through a divorce right now. *sighs* i'm not sure i can handle him right now. but it is christmas and i've been unable to talk to him for months. me = worst daughter EVER.
*sighs*
i just wish things were different between me and a lot of people. it seems people are still mad at me and that makes me more sad. i've screwed up quite a bit lately and i'm pretty sure i've burned every bridge i ever had between me and a lot of people. i feel so alone lately and it's my own fault.
i guess the main reason i've never like christmas is because my family was never a real family. always fighting, always distant, always annoyed with each other, rarely ever a happy moment. i was only jealous and still am of people that have a family that wants to be with them and wants to seem them and calles them up and says "we love and miss you come home please." i only had that when bill was alive and i desperately miss you him much right now. i'd give anything in the world just to see him and hug him and be with him right now. i know he truely loved me and i truelly loved him.. we were best friends right off the bat. january 12th is coming up fast. that's going to be an awful awful day for me. because of course i work and it's the day he died.
ok i need to stop thinking about all this, and stop crying. maybe i'll get a hug from some stranger today that'll make things better. *shrugs* who knows. i know my best friend and his family got their gifts but i know they were waiting to open them for today. so it'll be a while before i know if they like what they got. i know adam and rusty got their gifts and liked them all. i feel awful, i haven't much to give anyone right now because i dont get paid till thursday. *sighs*
so please today, as a christmas present to me, dont hate me or be upset with me, at least for today. it's hard enough as it is. *sighs*
well i leave you with the following:
I hear that in many places something has happened to Christmas; that it is changing from a time of merriment and carefree gaiety to a holiday which is filled with tedium; that many people dread the day and the obligation to give Christmas presents is a nightmare to weary, bored souls; that the children of enlightened parents no longer believe in Santa Claus; that all in all, the effort to be happy and have pleasure makes many honest hearts grow dark with despair instead of beaming with good will and cheerfulness.
- - - Julia Peterkin "A Plantation Christmas" (1934)
Calvin: Well. I've decided I do believe in Santa Claus,
no matter how preposterous he sounds.
Hobbes: What convinced you?
Calvin: A simple risk analysis. I want presents. Lots of presents.
Why risk not getting them over a matter of belief?
Heck, I'll believe anything they want.
(Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes
The holiest of holidays are those
Kept by ourselves in silence and apart;
The secret anniversaries of the heart.
(Henry Wadsworth Longfellow)
How many families, whose members have been dispersed and scattered far and wide, in the restless struggles of life, are then reunited, and meet once again in that happy state of companionship and mutual goodwill, which is a source of such pure and unalloyed delight; and one so incompatible with the cares and sorrows of the world, that the religious belief of the most civilized nations, and the rude traditions of the roughest savages, alike number it among the first joys of a future condition of existence, provided for the blessed and happy!
(Charles Dickens)
Christmas - that magic blanket that wraps itself about us, that something so intangible that it is like a fragrance. It may weave a spell of nostalgia. Christmas may be a day of feasting, or of prayer, but always it will be a day of remembrance - a day in which we think of everything we have ever loved.
(Augusta E. Rundel)
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic.
(Unattributed)
I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph.
(Shirley Temple)
And So This Is Christmas;
And What Have We Done?
Another Year Over;
A New One Just Begun;
And So Happy Christmas;
I Hope You Have Fun;
The Near And The Dear Ones;
The Old And The Young.
(John Lennon) | | |
| well as we all know very well, it's christmas eve. and all i've heard out of my little brother for the last two days is "i want to open up presents." or presents this or presents that. it's driving me nuts. even prior to church tonight he was begging to open up presents. "i want presents." so it's family tradition that we open up one present on christmas eve. well after church all we heard out of him is 'IS IT TIME TO OPEN PRESENTS YET?" and other such screaming and yelling and rambling ons over presents. we finally get around to opening our one christmas eve present and guess what, none of my younger siblings are happy with what they got. trey got male perfume, hannah got a cool lamp, and campbell got a video game. i remember wishing i had stuff like that for christmas. *sighs*
i got what i asked for. a real live penguin. though these penguins i dont have to feed and take care of. why? because i got march of the penguins dvd. i'm very excited. i haven't seen it yet. i think i shall watch it while at work tomorrow if it's dead. ha.
blarg. i'm so very tired. i really wanted to take a nap when i got off work but i couldn't fall asleep. i hope i sleep tonight. but i've got an awful cough that wont go away. i keep managing to choke on all of my food. seriously whats the deal with that? it started last night at applebee's. *sighs* i've the worst karma EVER.
goodness, im not sure living with a family is going to be healthy for my sanity. the kids fight and scream all the time. do they ever get along? they haven't any manners. blarg. i'm going to try to fix that. parents are far to laxed with a lot of stuff and it bugs me. my mom was pretty laxed but my sister and i knew how to behave and clean up after ourselves. blah. *keeps thinking, only four months only four months*
arg, i'm not much of a fan of christmas. *sighs* but i hope everyone has a fantastic break, while i'm ripping my hair out trying to train small monkeys. *sighs*
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| well, it's christmas eve and i'm at work. blah blah blah. well at least i'm working in the morning so i can go to christmas eve services tonight at church.
so LOTS of drama unfolded yesterday due to my comment about my missing ice cream. i feel dreadfully awful about it. but i was told that the drama between two people was much deeper than ice cream. *sighs* i still feel awful about it. yesterday evening i walked into a huge bout of that drama without them knowing. it made me incredibley uncomfortable. i wanted to step in and help but it wasn't my place. i feel terrible for not interjecting, but i would've only made things worse. *sighs* to those people i'm dreadfully sorry.
i'm at work and the coke cola guys came in the fill the machine and this was there conversation i over heard.
Coke Guy 1: So he committed suicide? huh? *bewildered*
Coke Guy 2: That's what they're saing but they haven't heard back on the autopsy yet.
yea. wonderful christmas eve conversation if you tell me.
i really haven't much to report. i guess i'm just letting people know that i'm alive.
*shrugs*
i'm sure i'll make a post later today about how much i hate christmas, so be forwarned.
//better days\\
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| whoa is me. *sighs and doubles over in pain*
i hurt very badly.
my womanly parts are in so much pain.
i have to go to the bathroom every five minutes
and its not a pleasent experince
i've a migrain and i'm terribly tired. i think i
may still be sick.
it doesn't help that i came home to find a
virtually empty ice cream container of a half
a gallon of ice cream that garrett and i bought
two days ago and have both only had one bowl of,
i know i talked to him.
ugh. and i'm in the process of moving so none of
this is really welcomed. not that it ever was.
now i must call the womanly doctor and the regular
doctor and i should probably call the head doctor
to figure out why people dont seem to like me.
*sighs and crys*
i hurt. | | |
| well, i suppose it's time for an update. *checks calendar to see when the last time i updated was* monday ago wasn't to long ago. yet i'm still updating with nothing much to say. *shrugs* oh well.
i'm currently in the process of moving. i hate packing, almost enough to say anyone want any of my stuff come and get it. HA but that's not going to happen because if it did i wouldn't have anything and that'd be bad.
so, i talked to my best friend today. he and his family and a friend of ours are all upset with me because i sent them christmas gifts. *sighs* i just can't win anywhere with anyone can i? seriously, enough people are here are mad and upset with me as it is, the last thing i need are a handful of people mad at me because i sent them christmas gifts. *sighs*
Dear World,
Why do you and all your contents hate and loathe me so much?
--me
yesterday i ran errons with "mom" and packed up most of my belongings. *sighs* again i hate packing. yesterday morning campbell had a thing at school so i went to that. it wasn't what i was expecting. "pops" read the polar express to the 3rd graders (parents and visiters weren't allowed in the rooms, though they were invited to attend the festivites? bizzare if you ask me).
i've been registering for classes. *sighs* stupid isis wont let me get into classes that have a prereq that i've already completed. I HATE ISIS. i scoff at you isis. ha.
well, plans for may are going crazy. my sister's graduation, my best friends graduation and commissioning service, trip to germany, camp school. soo much. i may actually be missing my sister's graduation. my best friend commissions the same day. i'd rather see him than my family. (grr my family *shutters*) besides my sister already told me she's not coming to my graduation, which is fine because i graduate in december and we dont hav december graduation ceremonies. so HA. so i'll drive up to see the commissioning. and a day or two later hope a plane to germany for 10 days to see family and friends. oh i miss germany sooo much. then back to the states and rest for a day or so (rusty can i stay with you again? are you going to camp school?). this it's off to camp school for a week at PV then off to camp till august! w00t w00t! i'm very much excited all around about this. the whole trip to germany depends on my fin. aid. and work. but i haven't been there in forever and i totally miss ari. she's at university now. ari, marie, julia, petros, dominique. *sighs* it's been forever and my german probably SUCKS.
nothing much more to report. just working and moving. no one seems to want to talk to me anymore. *sighs* so i'm just going to go shut up and read or something.
here's to better days.
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